Sunday, September 30, 2012

Gimme something to believe in...

*Please note this post contains some vulgarity. Sorry!*


Finding words when talking about difficult things like this is always hard. One month ago today Jay and I lost a very good friend of ours, Jared. I had the pleasure of knowing Jared just a few years, however, the time I spent with him were some of the funniest and entertaining of all my life. 

Jared was just 35 when he took his fiance, a dear friend of mine, Britney to AC for her birthday. He had such wonderful plans for her birthday trip. He had such wonderful plans for their life together. Its sad when anyone dies of course, but it seems to hit harder when its someone so young. Someone with thier whole life ahead of them. Jared and Britney were set to be married September of 2013. She kissed him goodnight the night of her birthday and woke up to him gone. 

Death always brings the unanswered questions. Why did they have to die? Why do I have to lose my friend/fiance/child/parent/etc? What could I have done differently? There are never answers to these questions, all you can say and believe is its God's choice, and it was their time. Well sometimes I wanna say fuck that! How can it be someones time at 35? Or 25? Or in the case of my poor cousins son FOUR?! How is that their time? They didn't even have time to live? Well all you can do is have FAITH. Faith is hard to have at times like these. I see my friend heartbroken over the loss of her husband. I see her dealing with issues she shouldn't have to be after his death. I myself have cried myself to sleep over this. I feel guilty that I am going on with my life, and I can kiss my husband goodnight. And she cant. 

I know that she will eventually find someone else, and she will be happy someday. But I cant find the words she needs to hear to comfort her. Nothing is comforting enough to help her. All I can do is be a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen with. She WILL get thru this, but in the meantime, all I can do is pray and have faith in God. 

Jared's father couldn't have said it better. If you asked him for a dime, he'd give you a quarter. He treated my kids like his own. They called him Uncle Jared. It hit AJ as hard as it hit us. It just sucks. 

If everyone can say a little prayer for my friend Brit, she needs em. Jared, love and miss you buddy!

Saturday, September 29, 2012

I need a new design!

Who here is good with blog design? I want a new design, any input?! Help a girl out! Cant pay much, but maybe we could work something out? Thanks!

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Peekaboo! I see you!

So, back by popular demand are my blog posts! Haha. Both Jay and my seester Shannon said I should start writing again so here I am. My house is clean, AJ is at school and Jalyn is "napping" (aka playing while she SHOULD be napping haha). We have a playdate later and AJ has his first school picture day today. I'm a little sad at the thought. I cant believe our little baby is in Kindergarten! Where has the time gone?! So updates...Jay and I celebrated 4 years married in May-GO US! Our time together hasn't always been rainbows and sunshine, but we always pull thru together. We love each other and our kids and there is no one we'd rather spend forever with then each other! Things are going well for us for the most part. We're happy, healthy and together. We've had some "family" with some personal issues who have distanced themselves from us but screw it! Honestly, my life has been less annoying without them! Real family never walks away. Anyway moving on! Khloe is SUCH a good dog. The last time I posted we had gotten her not long before. Jalyn terrorizes that poor girl, shes always dressing her up, making her drink tea etc etc. And Khloe never even walks away. She's SO Starks reincarnated. Best dog EVER. AJ is LOVING Kindergarten, and doing so well. He actually has been getting different work then his classmates due to being so advanced. Even his teacher said he should have started school last year! Damn cutoff. Jalyn is a sassy little diva. I couldn't have been more on point when nicknaming her Diva while I was pregnant. She just started taking real dance classes, and even being the youngest one (she technically isn't old enough to take the class, thank goodness for family owned dance school!) and still was the only one to make it thru the entire class! Go Jalyn! AJ Starts Hip Hop for his second year this Sat. He loved it last year and they did a dance actually around him. Ill have to post the video, super cute! Well that's all for now! I wrote up a bunch of ideas for blog writing so hopefully now that helps me get going! What have YOU all been up to? Any ideas for me to write about? Lets hear em!
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